The Conceptions of Eden

No Such Thing As Passing On

Splitter-Splatter angel face don’t let your paint peal down,

No mercy for your crooked soul, no mercy for your frown

Now swish and sway your body ‘lest they put it in the ground,

It ain’t no hazy, happy day on this here merry ‘round

If you don’t prove your liveliness they’ll break your hollow head

Your institution colored skin will shake and rot unfed

Don’t crick, don’t crack, don’t waste away, the weather’s in your head

Splitter-Splatter Angel face, dead things, never dead

                If you’d like to linger on, if you’d like to stay,

                You must wander through the night, you must wax and wane

                Don’t you let them rest you love, don’t you let them pray

                Slip into their beds at night, then slip into their brains

Dead things never dead here love, dead things never dead…

The Pledge

You can watch her dance now

In her wooden shoes

On little paper airplanes

And floating glass canoes

You can watch her fly now

On her reaching wings

Restrained with satin bows

And held aloft by strings

You can see her vanish

Won’t take her very long

Turn your head one moment

In another, she’ll be gone

You can see the pledge

That sewed her lips up tight

Won’t let a morsel enter in

Or let a prayer take flight

You can touch her if you want

Just feel the empty space

In it you can brush a soul

Dislocated out of place

You can watch her kneel now

Her protruding painted knees

And all around her whispers

The echoes of her pleas

Claiming Planets

I can’t seem to claim a small piece of you

That you gave to someone else

Chasing it down like bags in the wind

You set them free

She wins

My arms can only hold so many parts

They start to fall away now

Running after all the fragments of you

She seems so sad

Me too

No papers to throw her way, no documents

Can’t reclaim what’s yours, hers

I just had to go claiming her planets

And now I lost

The bet

Pretend

I remember not too long ago

The rain was falling like blankets of snow

You said to me, with your hand on my… my…

Your eyes are like… baby blue skies

But they’re green and you know it

They’re green and you know it

I would paint the whole world that color

So everything would make you remember

But it’s like playing pretend

They’re blue when you see them… the end

The end

It’s not really a lie when you tell it

Because it sounds so damn sweet

And I am the most beautiful thing

When you sleep, when you sleep

You know baby, it can’t always be

Blueberry pancakes and me,

And me

Dedicated Endlessly II

Cherry wood and piano keys

The smell of apples and maple trees

Do you know, my heart craves these?

Oh to part my way from thee!

To rest in earth, to lie beneath

The soft fine dirt would comfort me

A place of silence, a place of snow

I wait for thee, in that place below

Sing to me my garden now

I crave to go, to lose somehow

The life that once was given me

The life I swore to guard and keep

If Promises that are made in love

Can be returned and laid to rest

I feel no guilt in my wounded arms

And hold no remorse with my last breath

Oh you my love, my ageless love

You will live on, in light and grace

Yet when winter’s chill bares your way

Come and visit my Garden place

And play for me, on worn white keys

Sing for me, my summer breeze

A time of love, a time for me

Dedicated endlessly…..

Climbs Amour

Climbs amour, obscene implore, along laced breaths of ether

       Rhyme deplore, white noise prescore, sublime and foolish creature

Lance abound, fourscore the ground, offensive starry reaches    

       Glance unbound, charlatan renowned, desole soaked long in pleases

                 Abloom adieu, a tomb c’est tout, antiquated diamond creases

Chocolate And Snow

Used to meet that man

Down there under the road

Said he was going somewhere

Said he was bound to explode….

Why he never left her I’ll never know

But they were something to see, like chocolate and snow

His hands on her back, spiders on the sly

Sent her shivering hands to the edge of her thighs

And her sounds were like freedom, her smile like rain

When he ventured to touch her, and call out her name

And though they never saw me, and I never told

Their movements would haunt me till my body grew old

One night he waited, in the heavy heat of July

While the river was rising and the moon climbing high

And his hat brimming over with a valley of rain

It was the last that I saw him, and heard of her name

For how long he waited, I’m never so sure

But his heart broke in pieces, at the waiting for her

And never have I seen a strong man so scathed

As that dark devil man, the night he was betrayed

Caitlin

            She takes small steps

But she takes big bites out of life

            She has no ring

But she’ll be somebody’s wife

            She dreams in hue

Though the world is black and white

            She loves to win

        Yet she can’t bear to fight

            She writes her story

And the words make up her heart

            She’s romantic

The tale tore her apart

            She looks forward

Though memories make her strong

            She knows silence

      But it’s just another song

            She doesn’t know

Her smile lights up like lanterns

            She never knew

How bright her tiny light burns

            She’ll figure out

Just how lovely she is inside

            She’ll see it shine

In that looking glass, in time

                Smile, Cait

                Happiness is yours for the taking

                Write, Cait

                Your futures here, in the making

                Burn, Cait

                That fire makes you stronger

                Shine, Cait

                Don’t you hide it any longer

Tell Me

Music under old stained glass

Fingers twined and holding fast

Early morning, wrapped in snow

Night and rain, then letting go


Quickened breath and beating heart

Drawn away and drawn apart

Farewells stolen, hopes held high

Though forbidden, not denied


Kisses on a hardwood floor

Left in heartache, wanting more

These, my dear, I hold on to

That one day, I’ll be with you

Stollen Innocence(Poem Written December 2006)

In a worn red leather journal, lies the thing that haunts me.  A past so near, you can see all the scars. And yet it seems so distant, because all the things that taunt me, happened to a girl I am no more.

 When I lie in my bed at night, when I am alone, and even when my lover caresses me… I can hear the voices, of men from different places, telling me to hold my tongue, not to breathe. I remember blood and unfamiliar hands touching my unwilling skin. I remember what I once used to be. I remember glass and knives and places I didn’t know. I remember crying to a God, my God, to save me.

There are things I cannot say, things I never could, things that you will only find within those pages. And there I carved my story, with shaky, frightened hands, hoping in the end that it would leave me. But sometimes I still hear, in the bitter of the night, my 12 year old heart beg for mercy. And sometimes I still hear, in the best and worst of times, all about the worthlessness they made me.

In a worn, red leather journal, I cannot bear to burn or read, you can find all about my story. You also will discover, the pain which I must cover, and the nothingness that lies inside of me.

Sometimes I find it so hard to hold on

I keep reviewing those times

Memories I hoped would be long gone

That appear in thoughts and rhymes

 God I wish you could hold my hand tonight

Trembling again in his wake

God please make everything alright

And ease my heart’s hollow ache

Deprived of a life worth living

Bitterness has taken hold

I find I’m forced to just keep giving

Please don’t let my heart grow cold

God I wish you could hold my hand tonight

As the hatred begins to form again

God please make everything alright

Teach me to break and not to bend

These scars hurt worse than anything

How can I begin to deny

Witnesses to where I’ve been

Silencing every broad faced lie

God I know you hold my hand tonight

As I lie broken in his wake

And God I know it’s going to be alright

I will find a way to end this pain

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